Notes from a Very Busy Summer

Greetings fellow nomads,

It certainly has been a while since I have been able to type anything of substance anywhere. Things have been rather busy for me the month or so since my last post. In an effort to get caught up here is a rough list of what I've been up to.

July 5: Fly from Shanghai to Toronto. I slept maybe 2 hours on the 14 hour flight, it left at around 5pm in Shanghai and landed at around 7pm in Toronto on the same day. Time zones are a killer. Last year I did a journal post on a 14 hour flight, if you are interested in understanding the joy of that experience give err a read.

July 6 - 12: Slept at very odd times throughout the days. Visited family and friends. Good times had by all.

July 13: Flew to New York City to visit Elvina. It is simply an astonishing place. I honestly can't recommend New York City enough to anyone out there. I thought that I would be indifferent to it as I have been to other major modern cities, but I noticed something special about it. After some reflection I realized that New York is special because it is the big modern city that all others try to emulate and pay tribute to, with varying degrees of success. Highlights of the trip included The Ellis Island Immigration Museum, Central Park, Times Square, and The Statue of Liberty. I thought that the latter would be cheesy, but it was simply breathtaking. Here are a few sample pics which will get uploaded to The Book and Flickr soon enough.





July 17: Return home with Elvina for a few days. Family related business ensued.

July 28: After saying goodbye to many of my family members and friends (including a jaunt up to my camp for a few day visit) I head back to the Orient. While three weeks sounded like a long time in the planning, it certainly was not in practice. I feel like I hardly saw anyone at all in my travels. My utmost apologies to the many of my friends that I missed.

July 29: Land in Shanghai after yet another 14 hour flight where I slept very little. Spend the evening in Shanghai and try to sleep on a couch, fail drastically.

July 30: Hop on a plan headed towards Xining, in Qinghai province. As the plan begins to board the rain begins to fall with a great deal of vigour. An announcement comes on that says that the plan is delayed for two hours on the runway. I eventually fall asleep despite all of the very loud chatter. Four hours later we take off.

Now I am spending the next few weeks traveling around a bit more of China. I am going to be in Qinghai, Gansu, and Sichuan provinces over the next few weeks spending my time at monastaries, pand reserves, and eating some very spicey food. Needless to say, I am excited for it.

My first full day in Xining was yesterday and I went to Ta'er Si, a nearby Tibetan Monastery. While it was full of loud, obnoxious tour groups who routinely took pictures in areas they were not supposed to, and were very loud in quiet parts, it was still very beautiful. I could not help but think that they were there to test my resolve as I struggled for enlightenment. Here are a few snaps.






Expect more to come in the near(ish) future.

Safe journeys,

G

The Seven Habits of Highly Ineffective Expats

Here we have another post that I put on Lost Lao Wai a little while ago, it has generated a rather lengthy debate which should be worth checking out if you are interested in.

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We’ve all seen them, and chances are we’ve all been them at one point or another. A quick walk to the nearest Starbucks or Metro in China, and you will notice that expats come in all shapes, sizes, and dispositions. In general, most of the laowais living here in the Middle Kingdom are fantastic people trying to make the most of their experiences. However, we all have our down points.

I have noticed in strangers, friends, and yes, even myself, seven habits that I think make you a very ineffective expat. My rookie year in China is nearing a close, so I plan on making a New Year’s resolution of sorts to break these bad habits that I know I have, and I sure to not be alone in them.

Habit #1
Comparisons

“It’s not like this back home”
“In [insert home country back home] it’s like….”

If you’ve never heard this whine then you must not be talking to many foreigners, and if you’ve never said this then you must not talk to anyone period. For a number of people nothing here can ever be as good as it is back home, wherever that may be.

Obviously, the coffee here is not going to be as good as it is in the West. Clearly the Chinese are not experts at making hamburgers and french fries. The public transport is very clearly going to be much, much more crowded here than back home. Yes, the streets are probably dirtier here than a street in the suburbs.

These are the charms that keep China interesting, and very different from home. You will not be able to get a cup of tea back home like you can here, no Western chain will be able to satisfy your fried rice cravings, and just where are you going to spit when you have to back home?

I will never claim to be innocent of this ugly habit, but there has to be a time and place where you need to accept China for what it is, a wildly different place. While some things are better at home, there are definitely things that are better here. It is important to try to keep that in context, especially when you are experiencing the worst this nation has to offer.

Habit #2
Counting Down

“Thank God, only six more months until I go home!”
“What’s the point in learning the language if I’ll only be here for two years?”

It’s very natural to be excited to get home (only thirteen days for me!!!!), but that excitement should really not consume you. Being obsessed with going home is a logical extension of Habit #1.

There are always going to be great things to look forward to in the future, but if you take a look around there are probably some pretty great things to look forward to right now.

Rarely is it ever healthy to live for the future, as it often lets your present fly by.

Habit #3
Getting Stuck in a Rut

“Let’s meet at the usual Starbucks”
“It’s [Insert Day of the week] are you going to [Insert usual location for said day of the week]“

Ready to go out for dinner? Well be sure to go to the same place you went to last week since you know the food is “safe”. Of course, the fact that the staff speak English helps since you are in the mood for an “easy” dinner experience. Afterward be sure to go to the nearby Starbucks for the taste of home. Oh, and don’t forget to pick up some groceries from the nearby market to pick up some peanut butter and Western cereal.

Sounds familiar? Lord knows it has for me on many, many nights.

Humans are by our very nature creatures of habit. However, it is really, really easy to go too far on that one, especially when you live in a foreign country. While there is certainly no harm in a little routine and structure, there is certainly a line to be drawn. If you’re not careful you’ll end up in the same habits that you were trying to escape from back home.

Habit #4
Obsessive Traveling

“I have three days off, I think I’ll head to Thailand”
“I’ve seen all of China, time to explore a new country”

Oh lord am I ever guilty of this one.

Part of the joy of living in China is the proximity to such dream destinations as Thailand and Cambodia. This coupled with the frequent holidays often afforded to expats seems to lead to a mass exodus of the country whenever there is any sort of break.

I was very, very guilty of this one during my first six months in the country. I was lucky enough to have a week off in October, two weeks off at Christmas, and two weeks off for the Lunar New Year (I’m a teacher what can I say?) during those five total weeks I went to Malaysia, Vietnam, Cambodia, and Thailand, with a brief stop-over in Hong Kong for one of those trips. That’s right, with five weeks off I spent no time in Mainland China. Granted, I had previously visited the “main sites” such as Beijing, Xi’an, and Guilin, but clearly it is not right to say that I have done China.

This is definitely the attitude of several people who have been here, even for a short amount of time. However, upon even an ounce of reflection, you should realize that of all countries in the world China is probably the most difficult to fully do. China has the largest population in the world, the third or fourth largest land area (depending on who you ask), and the longest uninterrupted history (depending on who you ask) making it a very hard place to fully see, and an even harder place to understand. If someone has only been to New York and Washington, they would never be able to rightly claim to say that they have seen all of the United States, so why is it ok to make that claim after you have seen Beijing and Xi’an?

By all means use your time to travel, and makes those trips to some of the fantastic places Asia has to offer, but don’t forget the one that you live in. It’s certainly worth looking at.

In case you are curious, I spent my most recent holiday in Xinjiang and plan to go to Sichuan and Yunnan during the summer, lessons learned.

Habit #5
Increased Alcohol Consumption

“A litre of beer costs less than a dollar!”
“Liange pijiu”

Clearly the most dangerous of the seven habits listed here. Given the incredibly low prices on alcohol, coupled with the equally low existence of liquor laws can lead to an increased consumption of alcohol.

To make matters worse is the problem of boredom. In a recent edition of Business Week, they ranked the 20 Worst Places to Work, and 5 cities in China were on the list, including my current location. On all five Chinese cities one of the concerns listed was a lack of cultural and recreational facilities. Regardless of whether you feel that the report was accurate or not, this shows that there is at least the perception that there is nothing to do as an expat in China. If people have nothing to do, or feel that they have nothing to do, then alcohol becomes an obvious source of recreation.

The consequences of this can be too vast to mention on a site like this, if you know anyone who is abusing alcohol please, please seek help from someone more qualified as anyone on this blog.

On a lighter side, I personally have not come anywhere close to having to make 12 difficult steps, but having additional beers with dinner has certainly increased my waist line far more than would be ideal.

Habit #6
Decadence

“Don’t worry about spilling anything, the ayi will clean it”
“I don’t cook anymore, eating out is so cheap”

It’s pretty easy to see just how cheap China is.

It’s also easy to see that so many expat packages include accommodation, annual airfare, and health care. This leaves your money to be, well your money.

It’s also pretty easy to see that there are so many inexpensive luxuries ranging from ayis to cheap DVDs to delivery on anything to spend some of your disposable income.

What’s difficult is knowing when and where to stop. Life here can get very infantile if you have someone clean up for you, deliver your food for you, and you can get whatever you want by pointing at it. In many ways living in China can be like being five years old all over again.

While this is part of the attraction for a lot of people, I hope that you ask yourself what you think of the people who have that sort of a lifestyle back home.

Habit #7
Know it All

“I understand China”

Compared to some of your family and friends back home you may be an expert on all things Chinese. However, the reality of it is that at the end of the day you are not.

China has a very ancient and idiosyncratic culture, history, and language. These three things and intricately connected, and I think that it is difficult if not impossible to fully understand one of the three without understanding all of them.

So how do you get to understand any of these things? The only idea I can really come up with is trial and error, with a heavy emphasis on the error side of things. It is not very realistic to be able to think that you will be able to fully “get” this country, especially in as short of a time frame as one or two years.

A simple look through the comments and yes even some of the posts (including me, I fully admit) and it is not hard to see the Know-it-Alls out in full force. It is so easy to get caught up in the knowledge of the world that you do earn, but very difficult to know when to put a cap on it. But when it doubt, realize that you probably don’t get it and may never will.

So that just about does it for me, anyone have any ideas for any more habits? Lord knows there are more…

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Again, it is well worth looking at the comment section on this one. There has been a lot of intelligent, and a lot of very unintelligent debate posted there. I'll leave it to you to sort through that yourself.

Safe journeys,

G

Another Quick Note About China Net

Greetings all,

A little over a month ago, I made a post notifying people about YouTube being blocked (note: it still is). Well it turns out, as of this morning blogger and blogspot have been blocked as well.

You may be asking yourself, "How are you posting then?", and if you weren't, then, surely you need to do a bit of thinking. Well after ranting about it on twitter my friend Ryan (aka thehumanaught) turned me onto a service called Hotspot Shield. For those of you who don't know what it is, it is a VPN (Virtual Private Network) which are designed to both keep your network secure, but also to circumvent any firewalls, including the most comprehensive in the world, The Great Firewall of China, which periodically bans like (like YouTube and blogger, and all sorts of other fun stuff).

Hotspot Shield is a free service, and so far, so good. I can access my blog (obviously) and other sites which were previously blocked. It is a free service, so it occasionally throws up ads as either pop-ups or at the top of a window, but it is far from disruptive. If that bothers you too much, there are several more that you can find and pay for.

Either way, I would highly recommend you make use of one of these services....which I realize, that if you are in China then you can't access such a thing, but it could be coming back on later. This is especially important given that a few weeks from now is a certain anniversary of a certain event at a certain square, where nothing important happened...

So expect further delays for anyone trying to access any amount of truth within this interesting nation.

Safe journeys,

G

For further info on The Great Firewall, check out Wired magazine excellent article on the subject.

A Vegetarian's Introduction to China

Here is another repost of mine from Lost Lao Wai. You can find the original post, with some VERY interesting discussions in the comments here.

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Since I moved to China eight months or so ago, I've came across a large amount of challenges. They have ranged from communication breakdowns, to awkward stares, to being witness to things that you just can't unsmell. However, the question that I have been asked the most by my friends and family back home have centred around one clear topic, food.

I have spent much of the last five years as a practicing vegan. While this decision is one that I certainly consider to be a great one, it has certainly not made dining easy, especially in China, where meat is less an option and more a way of life. Worry not though, fellow herbivores, maintaining your lifestyle choices can be possible in the Middle Kingdom.

Eating an animal free diet in China is indeed a challenge, but one that is certainly possible to overcome. But before you step right in, you need to be clear of meat's place in China, both on the tables and in the minds of the people.

Meat is considered by many Chinese to be a status symbol, as it is generally more expensive than fruits and vegetables. As a result, the wealthy people tend to eat the most meat. This is a huge reason as to why the global consumption of meat has increased so rapidly in recent years. The Chinese are getting richer, and therefore consuming far more meat. This means that a wealthy foreigner should obviously eat lots of meat, since we clearly have lots of money.

Clearly, this in itself gives you quite the uphill battle. I had many occasions were I would communicate that I do not eat meat and it would be followed up with some very quizzical looks from the locals. It's not that I felt judged or harassed for my beliefs, I was just alien to them.

That being said, it still doesn't hurt to try to tell people that you are a vegetarian. If you can say the following phrase (or show the following characters) to a waiter, you could be off to a good start. "Wǒ shì sùshízhǔyìzhě" (我是素食主义者), this translates pretty directly to “I am a vegetarian”, which is of course a very useful thing to say. However, to be honest, I find it to be quite a mouthful to say, and don't feel that I can do it properly with all of the “sh” and “zh” sounds being thrown around. So if your Mandarin sounds as garbled as mine, try the much easier "wǒ bù chī ròu" (我不吃肉), which is saying “I eat no meat”.

Also, in many traditional Chinese dishes, meat is used less for substance, and more for seasoning. There are many great dishes in China that use just a little bit of meat to add flavour to the food (I would assume because the original cooks were too poor to use all of the animal), so be prepared for many dishes to contain some sort of meat in them.

Menus at Chinese restaurants can often involve some interesting, and unintentionally misleading translations, which can lead you to get tofu full of beef chunks, or a plate of broccoli given to you covered in ham. This can be avoided by a simple bit of character recognition. The character 肉 means “meat”, and it appears on most menu items that would contain any meat, as the direct translation of beef and pork are “cow meat” and “pig meat” respectively. So if you think that you see something like “Grandmothers fragrant garden roots”, check to find that character, because those garden roots may end up smelling like pig intestines. I find that character easy to remember, as it looks like a few cows in a pen unaware of their fate, or two wishbones sitting on a table waiting to be cracked.

If you still aren't certain, sometimes it can be helpful to point at something on the menu and ask "zhè ge yǒu méiyǒu ròu" (这个有没有肉) which is “Does this have meat?” and hope that they say "méiyǒu (没有)" indicating that there is no meat and you can stop stressing about the ordering and get back to enjoying your meal.

Of course the most important thing to remember, is to relax. There will more than likely be times were you are brought something with eyes or a beak on it despite your best efforts. My best advice in those situations is to just give the food to your friends (Chinese meals are meant to be family style anyway), and enjoy your rice or whatever else you may have. Then get ready to try again for the next meal, which of course may be soon given that you only had rice for dinner.

China can be a very frustrating place for a lao wai, but if you try to skip the food and stay with the Western establishments then you are missing out on an interesting and important part of Chinese society. So, Veggies out there, please do yourself a favour and try to brave some Chinese restaurants. After all, with the rate things are going here, all the Western restaurants will just be KFC soon enough anyway, then what are you going to eat?

Safe journeys,

G

A Quick Note About China Net

Well it seems like they are at it again!!!

As of yesterday, the incredibly popular site, YouTube, has been banned here in the PRC. This comes just over a year after it was last banned during the protests leading up to the Olympics. The statement from the government is: "China's internet is open enough, but also needs to be regulated by law in order to prevent the spread of harmful information and for national security".

This adds to the many popular sites that I am currently unable to access. Apparently the iTunes music store (which I don't use anyway) doesn't work over here, neither does Daily Motion (a competitor to YouTube), and any blogs on wordpress, as well as many other sites somehow related to the two naughty "T" words (T1bet and Ta1wan...if you didn't get it those 1s are supposed to be "i"s). Also, the Chinese version of Skype (called Tom-Skype) filters out the use of a certain four letter "f" word, and reportedly tracks any mention of certain "hot words".

Somehow though, blogger accounts (like this one), pirated music sites, and Chinese video sharing sites (like Youku and Tudou) work just fine.

Apparently one of my friends tried to make a status update on Facebook relating to YouTube not working and it was erased...I highly doubt that is a coincidence. While Facebook is not officially blocked, it can sometimes be "down" or slow for no apparent reason.

While I am not going to comment on the moral grounds for such decisions, I will say this. They sure are frustrating for people like me. I depend on the internet for contact with the outside world as best I can, but situations like this can be more than aggravating.

So if any of you out there my apologies if I haven't kept up-to-date with your blog, or watched the latest Diet Coke and Mentos video, hopefully you'll understand.

Safe Journeys,

G

Logging My Journey...

Well hello there everyone, it's official, I'm back in business!!! Welcome one and all to the season premiere of Getting Glenergized, coming to you live and direct from the People's Republic of China!

For my first post of the season, I decided to do a live log of my Trans-Pacific Flight, since well I was pretty darned bored. Here is the journey of my flight, taking place on August 20-21st....enjoy!!!

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Current Time: 1:26PM EDT
Current Mood: Excited
Current Soundtrack: The Arcade Fire - Keep the Car Running

The captain has turned off the seat belt light, and I have moved my way back to a free row, where I now sit. I'm bunking in seat 40D for the next 14 hours or so of my life. The take off was smooth, but is now a little bit bumpy, I can't help but feel that is some sort of an omen.

I have spent the last several days, if not months, preparing for this trip. I got my passport renewed, my visa sorted out, said all of my goodbyes, and now here I am way thirty thousand feet above the country I have called home for most of my life, and there is no turning back. Since I left my school back in June, I have been saying goodbye, and quite frankly, I am a little sick of it. While it has been nice to bid everyone farewell, and given me a great deal of closure, this time has been long overdo.

Every goodbye, from my friends to my students to my parents, carries with it a certain amount of emotion, and dare I say, a hint of regret. Did I say all that I need to? Did I do everything with this person that I wanted to? How much of my time did I waste that I could have spent with this person? In the end, it doesn't matter, because what's done is done, and nothing can be changed. There are all sorts of people that I will miss greatly over the next year or two (or more?) but such is life, especially the life of a nomad like me.

Anyway, I am going to be off to find some way to entertain myself for the next little while, I'll be back to post whenever that bores me.

Current Time: 2:37PM EDT
Current Mood: Schemy
Current Soundtrack: Wolf Parade - Grounds For Divorce

After playing a bit of Civilization III, I decided to watch an episode of "Kenny vs. Spenny" on the enRoute TV, and it got me thinking. Why don't I have horrifying challenges with friends of mine? I think that I am equal parts diabolical Kenny and neurotic Spenny. It would be pretty hilarious. Anyone out there in the blogosphere want to engage in some sort of maniacal and humiliating challenge? The possibilities have endless hilarious outcomes.

Alright time to go, off to scheme.

Current Time: 3:35PM EDT
Current Mood: Accomplished
Current Soundtrack: Tegan and Sara - Call it Off

I played a bit more Civizilation and I got a pretty easy (and dare I say) impressive Domination Victory as the Persians. I am pretty proud of myself for that one, so I think that I'm going to either erect a statue to my greatness, or maybe just start a new game soon enough.

Sadly, all of the windows are closed, and the on screen map is not working, so I really have no idea where the heck I am, but I would guess that I am probably leaving Ontario shortly (if I haven't already) which actually means that I have crossed the first of the 11 time zones that I will pass today. For simplicities sake, I'll keep writing in Eastern (Toronto) time, no point in trying to wrap my head around that one, although it could be kind of funny, especially when daylight savings are taken into account of it all. What a crazy world we live in.

I have the entire three rows to myself, and I have yet to try putting my feet up, as I have left my computer bag on the middle seat next to me, I guess I want to make it as comfortable as possible when I try to lie down and have a nap, which may just be soon.

I just took a second to peruse the movie choice, and I think that I am going to give 21 a try. Partly because I heard it's awesome, partly because it's about math geeks like me, and partly because Troy says one of the guys reminds him of me, I want to see how right he is.

Current Time: 5:51PM EDT
Current Mood: Enthusiastic
Current Soundtrack: Rebelution - Safe and Sound

21 kicks ass, make a point to watch it. Also of note, it has one of the greatest soundtracks for any movie I have seen in a while, from Peter Bjorn & John to LCD Soundsystem to the sweet Rolling Stones remix at the end, it was a tour de rock.

For the record, the main character is a touch Glenish, but not quite as much as Troy let me believe. Mostly because I don't think that I could land a gal as gorgeous as he did. (Note to the Future: If a significant other of mine is reading this somewhere down the line, I was clearly wrong on that one)

Still not really sure where I am, but I think that I am somewhere over the Pacific Ocean right now, and lord only knows what time zone it is, it is probably best not to ask such questions for it will only make me feel small. A lot of people are sleeping on the plane right now, and I'm not really sure if I should try or not, I feel tired, but only because it is dark in here, and there isn't much else to do. However, Shanghai is waking up now, so I feel a certain sense of energy and enthusiasm at this point. I think that I will celebrate by making a second case for world domination.

Current Time: 6:54PM EDT
Current Mood: Reflective
Current Soundtrack: Jeremy Fisher - Left Behind

"You're always dreaming so far ahead, I feel a little left behind. We'll never find each other my love in the same place, at the same time"

That's a quote from the above mentioned song. It seems appropriate considering how far away I'm going and for how long.

Here's hoping those lyrics ring true for someone special out there.

Current Time: 7:47PM
Current Mood: Confused
Current Soundtrack: Hawksley Workman - Jealous of Your Cigarette

I think that it's dinner time, or maybe it's breakfast. I'm not really certain. Either way, they are serving me food, so I guess it is time to eat.

Note to Future Travellers: Request a special meal on the plane, you'll get served way before anyone else. Score another point for veganism, take that omnis.

I noticed that I have a chance to watch Batman Begins. While I have seen it before, I think that I will love it even more now that I have seen Dark Knight three times, in theatres. For the record, I would like to nominate that film for an Academy Award for Best Movie EVER MADE.
Maybe I'll try and get some sleep soon, although Batman gets me really excited so it may be a bit of a challenge, ahh well, I shall do my best.

Current Time: 10:09PM EDT
Current Mood: Inspired
Current Soundtrack: Neil Young - Keep on Rocking in the Free World (Live Acoustic)

Three simple words: Batman Kicks Ass

I forgot how fantastic the first installment in the Nolan Reboot actually is. Granted it isn't half the movie that Dark Knight, but I don't think that much really is.

A few hours ago, I wanted to have humiliation contests with my friends, now I want to be come a ninja and fight crime. I guess I should start putting "Impressionable" as my mood from here on out. I chose this song to listen to because of that desire to help out, and also for cheeringly ironic reasons, considering my destination.

Watching Batman, and listening to Neil, I can't help but wonder exactly what I can do to make the world a better, more just place. I chose to become a teacher to be a guiding light, and good influence on others, and I like to think that I have the power to accomplish that, but I wonder, is it enough? The world is a massive place, full of some very bad people, surely a good person such as myself can do something to help, can't I? I guess I have to figure out some way to save the world. As I re-read that last sentence I can't help but wonder, maybe that is the meaning of life and everyone's grand purpose, saving the world from itself.

Or maybe my purpose now is to try and get some sleep, only five hours left to go.

Current Time: 12:00AM EDT
Current Mood: Restless
Current Soundtrack: Sigur Ros - Starlafur

I've been on this plane just short of 11 hours and have yet to get a wink of sleep...uggh.
I really have nobody to blame for this at all, the other passengers have been reasonably quiet and I have three seats all to myself. I guess I'm just anxious. Perhaps I should title this blog post "Confessions of a Travelling Insomniac", or maybe not, that is kind of lame.

When I look at the time, it occurs to me that it is now August 21. However, I crossed the international date line awhile ago, so it has been the 21st for quite some time. Damn time zones, so hard to wrap your head around.

Well, hopefully this is the last post I make until I arrive at my pad in Suzhou. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Current Time: 1:57AM EDT
Current Mood: Exhausted
Current Soundtrack: The Killers - Read My Mind

I got about an hour and a half of sleep, and I think that will probably be it.

I was woken up a little while ago for breakfast, or lunch, or maybe it was a midnight snack, I really don't know anymore. Ugh, tomorrow is going to be rough. Or rather, today is going to be rough. Either way, I'm pretty damn excited about it.

Descending time will start soon, the computer should get packed up soon. China, here I come!

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Current Day: August 24, 2008
Current Time: 4:05AM EDT
Current Mood: Serendipitous
Current Soundtrack: Children playing

I'm here now in Suzhou, as I have been since I finished the above post, and all is well. My apartment is fantastic, my colleagues are wonderful, and everything looks like it is going to work out just fine.

I will post back with new information soon as things start to settle down. If any of you out there are worried about me, please stop. All is well.

Until next time,

G

The Malarone Chronicles

Hello there all, I am writing to you livefrom the Laos People's Democratic Republic, and things have been going super dee duper well thus far. I've got lots of stories already, but only so much internet time to share them. The one thing that I want to talk about today is not the temples, the scenary, or the people, no it's the drugs.

If any of you have ever been to a tropical climate you may have heard of a little thing called Malarone. See Malarone is a drug that prevents you from getting Malaria, so it's a pretty handy thing to have. However, one of the side effects of Malarone is very, very vivid dreams. I have had a number of vivid dreams since I got here, but many of them were rather forgettable. However there are two that stand out.

During the first dream, I was in class teaching, when the Head of School came into my class and told me what a great job I had been doing teaching during my first year. Of course, I was humbled by this, and I thanked him for his kind words. He then told me that he wanted to thank me by giving me a present, and he proceeded to give me a key lime pie. Yeah, you read that right, I was given pastry as a recognition of success.

He then handed me an apple pie to give to another teacher, Rebecca. The thing was, this pie was in fact half-eaten. I looked at it awkwardly, and I was vry unsure as to the best method of giving her this pie as a way of saying thank you. Eventually, I cornered Rebecca in the school chapel and gave her the pie and said "You know that this is for", only to wake up confused, and a little hungry.

The next dream, however, is far odder. See, in my dream I was stuck on the island featured in the show Lost, with all of the characters on the show. Now, in the dream we were going to confront the "Moster" which has been a staple on the show since the firt season. After peering beyong a door, we figured out that it was going to be there, and we figured out that it would be a dragon or something else equally frightening. When we barged into the room, we found something more terrifing than any fire-brething lizard.

We found a home and garden show.

Seriously.

After taking a seat, we listened to the leader of this show, talk, and many people chanted back, in a zealous manner. The leader, then said "It's time for the most important part of this show, the human sacrifice". It was then informed, that everyone would have to write down the names of five people they felt should be sacrificed, and they would end up sacrificing the five people with the most votes.

I scurried around, and seemed to bump into everyone I knew, from Acadia, to Kodiak, to Nipissing, to teaching. A few people from various walks of life came to me, and said that they were going to write my name down, so I wrote down their name to counter it.

After I wrote down the names of four people the worst thing possible happened. I woke up.

I guess I'll never know what happens after the fifth vote was casted. Maybe that is for the best...

Until next time,

G

Music to Travel to

It's been a solid 7 months or so since I last did a soundtrack, but trust me, this one has been on my mind since I was in China! So I apologize for not doing one of these sooner, but I hope to make up for it in quality here. So without further ado...

1. Joel Plaskett -- "Nowhere with You". Astute readers may notice right off the bat that I included this in my last soundtrack, but I think that this song may be even more perfect here than anywhere else. This song is energetic and totally encapsulates a travellers mindset of going "nowhere with you", plus the "na na na" part is perfect to listen to while walking down some foreign street

2. The Strokes -- "Juicebox". While many people may not have liked First Impressions of Earth, I think that this song is a great rockfest. The line "Why don't you come over here? We've got a city to love" is a great indication of your early excitement and energy that every traveller starts out with.

3. Led Zeppelin -- "Communication Breakdown". Maybe this is just me relying on my own personal experiences, but I certainly remember being in places where nobody spoke any English and I certainly didn't speak any of the local language. It leads to some pretty hilarious moments where communication sure breaks down.

4. David Bowie & Trent Reznor -- "I'm Affraid of Americans". Nothing against people from the good ol' U.S. of A, but this is a wicked song. I put this song in here not only because it is amazing, but because it refers to the stereotypical "Ugly American" tourist. You know the type, the person who wants everything to be just like things are back home...I hate people like that. And for the record, some of the worst tourists I have ever met were Australian and Canadian....

5. Kaiser Cheifs -- "Oh My God". This song is perfect for that moment you realize just how far away from your friends and family you are. Listen to the line "Oh my God, I can't believe it, I've never been this far away from home..." and you'll know that you are not the only one to feel that way. By the way, check out Lily Allen's cover of this song if you get a chance, maybe I'm biased, but it's great!!

6. LCD Soundsystem --"North American Scum". This is for the time when you realize that you, yourself have become a bit of an "Ugly American" tourist, trust me, it'll happen at least once. By the way, I posted this video here once before and if you missed it, be sure to check it out.

7. The Dandy Warhols -- "Everyday Should be a Holiday". Great song, great band. This is one of those songs for the moment when you realize that you will, one day, have to return home to your dreaded "real life".

8. The Shins -- "Sea Legs". Here's were the playlist starts to slow down a bit. It might be a bit too sad for you, but I think the line "And we got sea legs and we're off tonight", is a good one for nomads everywhere.

9. The John Butler Trio --"Nowhere Man". It's a song about being nowhere in particular, it ties into the opening song on this list and is a great way to sum up those long bus/train trips when you feel like you aren't anywhere.

10. Broken Social Scene --"Looks Just Like the Sun". I could have easily put all of You Forgot it in People on this list, the album just blends itself to staring out a window of a train, but I think that this song might be the best one for this list. Mainly because of those long overnight hauls when you first see the sun and you're not sure if it is really there because you are so freakin' exhausted.

11. The Arcade Fire -- "No Cars Go". You all know how much I love Neon Bible, so of course I was looking to include a song on this list! But this one is perfect, I swear! It's about finding places where "No Cars Go", which is something you will certainly want once you get sick of all of those crowds and souvenir stands.

12. Sigur Ros -- "Untitled" (aka "Njósnavélin" aka "The Spy Machine" aka "The Nothing Song"). Really any song off of ( ) is a great choice, I just took my personal favourite here. For those not familiar with this album, it is sang entirely in Vonlenska, a language which the band made up. This album needs to be represented on any travel playlist because it so wonderfully demonstrates the ability to communicate without common language. You listen to the words and you have no idea what they mean, but you can clearly understand the point that they are trying to make. There are so many moments that this happened to me in China that have left a pretty drastic mark on my psyche, and this album will always make me think about them.

13. Michael Franti & Spearhead -- "I Know I'm Not Alone". The chorus says "Even though I'm far from home, I know I'm not alone", sums up everything from the bond between travellers to any connections you have with someone back home.

14. Feist --"It's Cool To Love Your Family"...and Feist makes yet another of my playlists, thus making it even more likely that her and I will be wed some day. Anyway, this is a great song to justify feeling homesick but not wanting to loose any face by admitting that you miss your mommy, chances are every other traveller has at one point or another.

15. Simon and Garfunkel -- "Homeward Bound". It's finally that time, time to head on back home. It's always a bitter sweet time, but Simon and Garfunkel will help you ease that transition with this classic.

16. Kanye West featuring Chris Martin -- "Homecomming". If you haven't heard this song go and buy Graduation right now!!! Not only will you get a great album but you will put 50 Cent that much closer to retirement. Anyway this unlikely duo come together to put out a really great song that mixes West's rapping and Martin's incredible vocal talents. They talk a lot about coming home and in the chorus the Coldplay front man asks "Do you think about me now and then?", which will tap into any traveller's concern that maybe they've been forgotten while they've been gone.

17. Johnny Cash --"I've Been Everywhere". I know there are about a zillion versions of this song, but I've always been partial to Johnny's. It's a great song to reminisce about your adventures to, which is clearly one of the most important parts of travelling.

Alrightie I think that's about all, let me know if I missed any big ones. Also, does anyone have any suggestions out there for future soundtracks? If so, let me know, I'd love to hear them!

Until next time,

G

Archieved Playlists

Music to Break-up to
Music to Wallow to
Music to Swoon to

Culture Shock

Hey all, I returned to Onterrible just a few days, and man oh man, things have been pretty weird for me. Things back in Canada are so different than what I have gotten used to in China. I know that I wasn't gone for that long, but I still have a few questions to ask...

Has everything always been so expensive?
Has the air always been so clean?
Have people always spoken English so freaking fast?
Have Canadians always apologized so bloody much?
Has tap water always been drinkable?
Has outside always smelled so good? (as opposed to pollution and urine)
Has it always been so easy to walk around without a pack on your bag?
Have I always been so glad to be home?

Anyway, I don't know the answers to all of these questions but I look forward to finding them out in the coming months...

Until next time,

G